Love-Hate-Abuse

The door clicked close, and she tip-toed into the orangely lit room, dark like days and orange like nights.
Black like the rage smelling room. She sneaked into the bathroom, hoping the silhouette near the window did not notice the walking shadows.

Dabbing her face with the white soft towel she sat down on the bed, turning the lamp on. Hoping to erase the tension in the atmosphere. But nothing changed. The silhouette, unmoveable. Cold. And dark near the window. Just as she left 15 minutes ago.

She sighed and pulled her back into a loose pony tail. Easing her self on the bed.
Just as she was about to reach for the book she had been reading for a week, her hand was jerked away.

She was so engaged in her thoughts, that she failed to hear the heavy footsteps on the floor. Or did she ignore?

The silhouette was now standing in front of her.

As manly as it could be, as strong as it needed to be.
And she felt the entire world spinning, her gaze stuck on his red eyes, clenched jaw and stone like fingers.

Forgetting to swallow her spit, she stared and in a matter of seconds, she was up on her feet yanked by the pony tail.

“ Why did you leave?” He roared.

A wave of pain shot through her skull, she tried to grab onto his strong wrist in an attempt at loosening the manly grip.

“ Tell me, why did you leave the house?” He inquired again, giving her head a jerk.

“ Ow” She hissed and cried. Squinting her eyes. Preferring the silence she stayed mute.

“ I am taking to you God Dammit” He inquired in rage, his fingers now digging into her flesh, her tiny frame.

Mute again, she opened her eyes. A sea of pain, hurt, love, and hurt swam in.

A blow on her nose, and fell to  her feet. Bleeding.

“ Can you answer me now, why did you leave the house when I asked you not to?, Do I not matter anymore?, Do my orders mean nothing to you” He got down on his knees, and pulled her face towards him, his eyes hazy, a little green with a color of hysteria.

She felt the wetness trickle down her nose, she dabbed at it, making herself hiss in pain, in agony.

And then, just like nothing happened, like the color red, in any form any shape, trickling down her made him normal.

While she sat there crying, in the midst of double roads, she had to decide today, this was it. She could not take this any longer.

The smell of the room changed, the air changed, Said without words and he walked up to her again.

“ please mujhe chhor ke mat jao. Main tumhare baghair mar jaunga. I’m sorry that I hit you, don’t go”

He cried like a baby.
Grabbing on to her hand, but she moved away. She was stronger than he was, she would not break in front of this man, would not fall here.

“ Dekho, main yeh sab waapis daal deta hoon, and it’ll all be back to normal, I promise, pakka wala” he said like an innocent kid while trying to put the blood back into her nose.

Fall 2

Standing blind folded, she had a secretive smile spread across her crimson face.

“ Kidher aye hain hum?” She whispered to the man beside her.

Without replying back, he grabbed her by the elbow and walked to the old building standing right in front of them.

Women laughing, men talking, they walked into the creaky old wooden door.

“ Must be my favorite restaurant.” she smiled to her self yet again, rubbing away beads of sweat trickling down her forehead.

But something seemed different, this place did not smell familiar. The air was murky, thick and pungent.
She felt bodies pushing here, one side to the other.

And all of a sudden, everything seemed wrong. Struggling to free herself of the blind fold and reach for her husband at the same time she fell on the floor.

She heard sharp threads of voices making their way to hear ears, laughter it was.

Looking around the room, still on the floor, she struggled to recognize the faces in front of her.
To recognize where she was.

Trying to reach for the man who had brought her here. Her husband, she looked to the left.
He was gone.

Leaving her with these animals, to chew off her soul bit by bit. 

batlaye koi... batlaye koi
kitni girhein kholi hai maine
kiti girhein aab baaki hai

Fall 1

Fixing his collar he walked down the stairs. Walking on the cold marble floor, he could see “himself “ in it. He made his way towards the lounge where his wife sat attending to a maid.

“ Why aren’t you dressed up yet” Inquired he. Lifting an eyebrow in agitation.

Standing up, nervous she tried to speak up “ actually, she, the..” weakly pointing towards the old lady sitting on the floor.

“ Okay enough, I would hear no more. Go now. I want you down here, dressed. In 15 minutes” lifting his right hand up, letting the steel watch slide a little on his wrist.

She hurried, carrying her svelte self towards the marbled staircase.

15 minutes later talking on cell-phone he put the car in the first gear.

“ You’ve got everything ready right?” he inquired anxiously while adjusting the rear view mirror.
Trying not let excitement creep her already mushy senses, she let out a happy sigh.

“ and she thought he had forgotten their anniversary” the thought made her smile, coloring her already rosy cheeks.

“ Where are we going?” setting her gaze on the road, right where his was.

“ Oh you’ll see” he said, meaningfully, caressing his chin.

Lost in her thoughts, staring out the window, she let the moment sink in, not realizing the narrow dark streets they had turned into.